The Way of the Superior Man

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A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire

The Ultimate Spiritual Guide for Men

What is your true purpose in life? What do women really want? What makes a good lover? If you’re a man reading this, you’ve undoubtedly asked yourself these questions—but you may not have had much luck answering them. Until now.

In The Way of the Superior Man, David Deida explores the most important issues in men’s lives, from career and family to women and intimacy to love and spirituality, to offer a practical guidebook for living a masculine life of integrity, authenticity, and freedom. Join this bestselling author and internationally renowned expert on sexual spirituality for straightforward advice, empowering skills, body practices, and more to help you realize a life of fulfillment, immediately and without compromise.

“It is time to evolve beyond the macho jerk ideal, all spine and no heart,” writes Deida. “It is also time to evolve beyond the sensitive wimp ideal, all heart and no spine.” The Way of the Superior Man presents the ultimate challenge—and reward—for today’s man: to “unify heart and spine” through the full expression of consciousness and love in the infinite openness of the present moment.

“I keep giving this book away; I think I’ve owned thirty different copies already. I tend to pass it out to anybody, man or woman, who has made a commitment to—or even has a passing interest in—the art of loving. David Deida gets it—like no one I’ve ever read and he writes about it forcefully, honestly, and downright poetically.”
--MICHAEL TUCKER Actor, author

The Way of the Superior Man is quite wonderful. Finally, a guide for the noncastrated male. This book will offend and infuriate some, inspire and test others, but challenge virtually everybody. Few are the books that discuss strong sexuality within strong spirituality, instead of tepid sexuality diluted by a mediocre spiritual stance. This book steps straightforwardly into the challenge. Love it or loathe it, it is a shout from the heart of one perspective of the eternal masculine.”
--KEN WILBER Author of Sex, Ecology, Spirituality; No Boundary; and Grace and Grit

“At last! A book that explains the heart and soul of a woman to men. As a woman, I’ve never felt so understood and validated. This book is a key to helping men and women take their relationships one step further. Finally, a clear and brilliant guide to unraveling the mystery of relationships.”
--MARCI SHIMOFF Co-author of the New York Times #1 bestseller
Chicken Soup for the Woman’s Soul

The Way of the Superior Man lays out a challenge before all men to fulfill their true purpose and to be authentically masculine. It will guide you on your journey to a successful and spiritually complete way of life. I invite you to live in the moment, to love openly, and to step up to the plate with this book in your hand.”
--TONY ROBBINS Author of Awaken the Giant Within and Unlimited Power

The Way of the Superior Man


part one: A MAN’S WAY

1 Stop Hoping for a Completion of Anything in Life 
2 Live With an Open Heart Even If It Hurts 
3 Live As If Your Father Were Dead 
4 Know Your Real Edge and Don’t Fake It 
5 Always Hold To Your Deepest Realization 
6 Never Change Your Mind Just to Please a Woman 
7 Your Purpose Must Come Before Your Relationship 
8 Lean Just Beyond Your Edge 
9 Do It for Love 
10 Enjoy Your Friends’ Criticism 
11 If You Don’t Know Your Purpose, Discover It, Now 
12 Be Willing To Change Everything in Your Life 
13 Don’t Use Your Family As an Excuse 
14 Don’t Get Lost in Tasks and Duties 
15 Stop Hoping for Your Woman to Get Easier 


16 Women Are Not Liars 
17 Praise Her 
18 Tolerating Her Leads to Resenting Her 
19 Don’t Analyze Your Woman 
20 Don’t Suggest That a Woman Fix Her Own Emotional Problem 
21 Stay With Her Intensity––To a Point 
22 Don’t Force the Feminine to Make Decisions 


23 Your Attraction to the Feminine Is Inevitable 
24 Choose a Woman Who Is Your Complementary Opposite  
25 Know What Is Important in Your Woman 
26 You Will Often Want More Than One Woman 
27 Young Women Offer You a Special Energy 
28 Each Woman Has a “Temperature” That Can Heal or Irritate You  


29 Choose a Woman Who Chooses You 
30 What She Wants Is Not What She Says 
31 Her Complaint Is Content-Free 
32 She Doesn’t Really Want to Be Number One 
33 Your Excellent Track Record Is Meaningless to Her 
34 She Wants to Relax in the Demonstration of Your Direction  

part five: YOUR DARK SIDE

35 You Are Always Searching for Freedom 
36 Own Your Darkest Desires 
37 She Wants the “Killer” in You 
38 She Needs Your Consciousness to Match Her Energy 


39 The Feminine is Abundant 
40 Allow Older Women Their Magic 
41 Turn Your Lust Into Gifts 
42 Never Allow Your Desire to Become Suppressed or Depolarized 
43 Use Her Attractiveness as a Slingshot Through Appearance 

part seven: BODY PRACTICES

44 Ejaculation Should Be Converted or Consciously Chosen  
45 Breathe Down the Front 
46 Ejaculate Up the Spine 


47 Take into Account the Primary Asymmetry 
48 You Are Responsible for the Growth in Intimacy 
49 Insist on Practice and Growth 
50 Restore Your Purpose in Solitude and with Other Men 
51 Practice Dissolving